From September 2017

Friday Frolics – 22nd September 2017

Welcome to Friday Frolics, the linky with the giggles. Friday Frolics is hosted by myself, Claire at Life, Love and Dirty Dishes, and Emma at Island Living 365. It’s the place to link up your funny posts and snort your tea whilst enjoying some others.

Thank you to everyone who linked up their fantastic funny posts last time. Next week there won’t be a Friday Frolics – we’re taking a break while everyone goes to Britmums! We’ll be back on October 6th – hope to see you then.

 
Friday Favourites

My favourite post from last week: Apply to Face Blog – Deep Fried Apple Pies. More hilarious and delicious recipes ,this time pie for those days where you’ve reversed into a parked car, forgotten the shopping, put bleach in the washing machine by accident, and nearly had a collision, all of which could of course happen to anyone!

Claire’s favourite post: ‘Daddy Poppins – Settling in at Creche. I particularly liked the code words in this post. My eldest son is often described as ‘vocal’ aka chatterbox / he never stops talking. They say this like it is news to me!!!’

Emma’s favourite post: ‘Four Princesses and the Cheese – Today Feels Like a Good Day to Start a Juice Cleanse. There is NEVER a good day to start juice cleanse. As someone who once did a juice cleanse for 7 whole miserable days, I feel Kirstin’s pain. She even went spinning, as if the juice wasn’t torture enough! This post will make you never want to touch a juice, ever!’

 
Most Read Post

Daddy Poppins – The Truth About Flying With Kids

 
If you missed these posts last week, do check them out – guaranteed a laugh.

Friday Favourites writers: Please feel free to grab the Featured Blogger badge below.

 

R is for Hoppit

 
 
I am looking forward to all the fun and frolics, but first for a couple of serious bits.

The Rules:

1. Make us laugh! Friday Frolics is all about the funny, so please no reviews, or how to make a finger puppet (unless, of course, they are hilarious).

2. Include the Friday Frolics badge in the post that you are linking. If you do not include the badge, you will not be eligible to feature as a Friday Favourite.

3. Comment on one of each of the hosts’ posts, and at least one other post for every post you link up. Share the fun people! Use #FridayFrolics when you comment on posts so people can see where you are linking from.

4. You can link up to 2 posts, old or new.

 
Other Stuff:

By joining this linky, you consent to receiving e-mails from me about Friday Frolics.

Follow us on twitter and tweet your links to @lifeloveanddd @sillymummy88 using #FridayFrolics for a RT.

The Linky will open at 8pm on Thursday evening, and close at 11pm on Sunday.

 
Now, on with the linky…

 

R is for Hoppit

 
 

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Amelia Has Fallen

Well, the list of the most popular baby names of last year has been released by the Office for National Statistics, and there has been something of a shock result at number one.

Not in the boys’ names. That’s still Oliver. All of the boys are still called Oliver. Urban legend suggests that some boys are actually not called Oliver, but they succumb to societal pressure to conform when they start nursery and school. They just resign themselves to the fact that no one is going to remember that they aren’t called Oliver, and everyone is going to call them Oliver. After about a week, they come to believe that they probably always were called Oliver anyway. Plus, they didn’t like feeling left out of the stampede that happens when the teacher says ‘Oliver, come and get your book/milk/bag/coat.’

So, no surprises with the boys. But the girls? Oh the girls. There has been a shake-up at the top. Amelia has fallen. This is not a drill. Amelia has fallen. Amelia, which has been the top name for so long we’ve actually all had time to get over the loss of Amelia Pond from Doctor Who during its reign, is no more. That’s a bit of an exaggeration: Amelia is number two. Didn’t fall very far, to be fair.

Oh yes, last year people giving birth to little girls went rogue, they thought outside of the box, they…well, they called the little girls Oliver too, basically. Yes, Amelia was finally toppled from the top by the feminine version of the reigning boys’ name. I imagine the thinking was: ‘This is all well and good – all the boys are called Oliver. It’s easy to remember. But this whole girls’ name thing is a problem. That name we’re using is like a whole separate name. Ain’t nobody got time for that shit. Surely there is something a bit more similar to Oliver we could be calling these girls?’ Then somebody had a brainwave. From way out of left field they came up with…well, the name that all the girls were called before they were all called Amelia, actually. (We’ve travelled back in time to 2010. I think Amelia Pond would like that.) The queen is dead, long live the queen.

Apparently, there was a period of about 200 years when all girls were called Mary once upon a time. And, of course, 9 out of 10 girls born in the 1970s and 1980s were called Jennifer. People like to be consistent. Or maybe everyone just gets these names stuck in their head and isn’t quite sure why: ‘Well, there was this one name I heard somewhere – I’m not sure where – that was quite nice…’ Thus the cycle continues. The self-perpetuating cycle of Oliver.

Of course, the main thing to note here – the really important thing – is that, no matter how many Olivers and Olivias there may be, only one couple were daft enough to call their baby Sir…

 
 
(*Disclaimer: This is just a bit of fun. I think Oliver, Amelia and Olivia are all lovely names. I do not think Sir is a lovely name. I think it’s effing stupid. That is all.*)

Friday Frolics – 15th September 2017

Welcome to Friday Frolics, the linky with the giggles. Friday Frolics is hosted by myself, Claire at Life, Love and Dirty Dishes, and Emma at Island Living 365. It’s the place to link up your funny posts and snort your tea whilst enjoying some others.

Thank you to everyone who linked up their fantastic funny posts last time. I’m linking up an old post this week because, well, I haven’t written a new one!

 
Friday Favourites

My favourite post from last week: Tales From Mamaville – 10 Things I Learnt While Moving House. Ah the joys of moving. Bubble wrap is distracting. Toddlers are distracting. No matter how much you seem to throw away, you will move stored clutter from one house to the next and still never use it.

Claire’s favourite post: ‘So Happy In Town – My First Day at Big School. I loved this view point. Made me laugh and brought a lump to my throat.’

Emma’s favourite post: ‘Five Little Doves – Lessons I Learned From Our First Camping Trip With The Children. Oh this was a post I could relate to. Did I ever tell you about the time Mr C and I went camping? Torrential rain, trench foot, mould and a body bag. I kid you not. Laura’s post made me really laugh but I also found it reassuring too. Perhaps we are ready to camp again…..’

 
Most Read Post

Mom of Two Little Girls – Reasons I Hate Being a Housewife

 
If you missed these posts last week, do check them out – guaranteed a laugh.

Friday Favourites writers: Please feel free to grab the Featured Blogger badge below.

 

R is for Hoppit

 
 
I am looking forward to all the fun and frolics, but first for a couple of serious bits.

The Rules:

1. Make us laugh! Friday Frolics is all about the funny, so please no reviews, or how to make a finger puppet (unless, of course, they are hilarious).

2. Include the Friday Frolics badge in the post that you are linking. If you do not include the badge, you will not be eligible to feature as a Friday Favourite.

3. Comment on one of each of the hosts’ posts, and at least one other post for every post you link up. Share the fun people! Use #FridayFrolics when you comment on posts so people can see where you are linking from.

4. You can link up to 2 posts, old or new.

 
Other Stuff:

By joining this linky, you consent to receiving e-mails from me about Friday Frolics.

Follow us on twitter and tweet your links to @lifeloveanddd @sillymummy88 using #FridayFrolics for a RT.

The Linky will open at 8pm on Thursday evening, and close at 11pm on Sunday.

 
Now, on with the linky…

 

R is for Hoppit

 
 

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Friday Frolics – 8th September 2017

Welcome to Friday Frolics, the linky with the giggles. Friday Frolics is hosted by myself, Claire at Life, Love and Dirty Dishes, and Emma at Island Living 365. It’s the place to link up your funny posts and snort your tea whilst enjoying some others.

Thank you to everyone who linked up their fantastic funny posts last time. The summer holidays are over, we’re all back and ready to laugh our way through Autumn.

 
Friday Favourites

Pop over to Emma’s blog to see her Friday Favourite for last week.

 

Friday Favourites writers: Please feel free to grab the Featured Blogger badge below.

 

R is for Hoppit

 
 
I am looking forward to all the fun and frolics, but first for a couple of serious bits.

The Rules:

1. Make us laugh! Friday Frolics is all about the funny, so please no reviews, or how to make a finger puppet (unless, of course, they are hilarious).

2. Include the Friday Frolics badge in the post that you are linking. If you do not include the badge, you will not be eligible to feature as a Friday Favourite.

3. Comment on one of each of the hosts’ posts, and at least one other post for every post you link up. Share the fun people! Use #FridayFrolics when you comment on posts so people can see where you are linking from.

4. You can link up to 2 posts, old or new.

 
Other Stuff:

By joining this linky, you consent to receiving e-mails from me about Friday Frolics.

Follow us on twitter and tweet your links to @lifeloveanddd @sillymummy88 using #FridayFrolics for a RT.

The Linky will open at 8pm on Thursday evening, and close at 11pm on Sunday.

 
Now, on with the linky…

 

R is for Hoppit

 
 

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Somethin’ Stupid (or Ballad of the Tinder Girl)

Today, I have written a parody to honour the undisputed person of the week: the woman who managed to go on a tinder date, throw her poo into the abyss between an internal window and the wall at her date’s house, get wedged upside down in the gap trying to retrieve the poo, and have to be rescued by the fire-brigade, wrecking the poor date’s house in the process. If you have managed to miss this epic tale of romance and poo, I suggest you read it. Because, well, she got stuck in a window trying to retrieve her own poo. In every sense, you cannot make this shit up.

So here is my parody of Somethin’ Stupid for Liam’s unfortunate date.

 
 
Somethin’ Stupid

 
I know I’m swiping left until you think you have the time
To go to Nandos with me
And if we go to yours for wine, I know that there’s a chance
I’ll need the lavatory
And afterwards you’re watching a Scientology documentary by Louis Theroux
And then I go and spoil it all by saying something stupid like “I threw my poo”

 
I can see it in your eyes
That you have never had a date who threw her poo before
And though there was a window there, that much is true
It didn’t actually lead outside at all

 
I practice gymnastics, I can fit into that gap and find some way
To retrieve the poo that I threw
But then I think I’m stuck in here head first still just trying to reach my poo
The time goes by, you’re worried now, the fire-brigade gets called and, oh, their light’s so blue
And then I go and spoil it all by saying something stupid like “I threw my poo”

 
The time goes by, you’re worried now, the fire-brigade gets called and, oh, their light’s so blue
And then I go and spoil it all by saying something stupid like “I threw my poo”

 
I threw my poo
I threw my poo
I threw my poo

 
I threw my poo