Cake: Just Like That

The Toddler likes to do magic. Very, very mundane magic. She brandishes her imaginary wand at Silly Mummy: ‘Close your eyes!’ Silly Mummy closes her eyes. Nothing happens. There is silence. Silly Mummy wonders if The Toddler is still there. Silly Mummy peeks. The Toddler is still there. She is building anticipation for her amazing feat of magic. She waves her wand again: ‘Open your eyes!’ Bit of an anti-climax. Less a feat of magic, more a feat of bossiness. Still, Silly Mummy has apparently earned a reward for her participation: ‘You can have cake now. I’ll get you cake.’

Silly Mummy is looking forward to her cake. However, it seems The Toddler may have been a little hasty in her offer: ‘I haven’t made cake yet.’ At least she has a solution: ‘I’ll make it.’

The Toddler puts down her wand, and starts piling random items from her toy tea set and toy cookery set on to the sideboard. She knocks them over by accident: ‘I’ve knocked your cake over now.’ Oh dear. The Toddler appears to feel the cake has not been harmed, however. She picks everything up and continues her imaginary cake preparation.

The Baby wanders over and knocks the same items off the sideboard as The Toddler did moments before. The Toddler spies a perfect opportunity to pass the blame for the cake delays: ‘You can’t have your cake now because of The Baby.’

The Toddler relents and decides she will serve the cake anyway. She starts rooting through her things, and reappears victorious: ‘I’ve found one knife now. I’ve just got to chop. Be careful. Here you go, Mummy.’ The Toddler holds out a plastic plate full of imaginary cake to Silly Mummy. Silly Mummy thanks her, and reaches out to take the cake.

The Toddler snatches the plate away: ‘You can’t have it yet.’ She walks off with the plate, and knocks over more of her toy cooking equipment. She decides this is the final straw: ‘Never mind, I’m not making it now. The Baby is cleaning it away.’ Silly Mummy looks at The Baby. She is certainly doing something with the imaginary cake and toy cooking equipment. Throwing it would be Silly Mummy’s description, but if The Toddler says she’s cleaning up…

The Toddler provides a final firm confirmation that Silly Mummy will not be receiving cake: ‘No, you can’t have it.’ Well, Silly Mummy is not sure this was worth opening her eyes for. Not that Silly Mummy chose to open her eyes. It was magic, of course.


  1. Mrs Tubbs says:

    You know that bit in Paddington where he does the magic trick with Mr Curry’s watch, but doesn’t read the instructions all the way through … Don’t let her watch that!

    A joy as always 🙂

  2. wendy says:

    Poor silly mummy not getting any cake. Imaginary cake is better than no cake at all. Love the toddler’s magic trick, I can’t wait for my little boy to start playing games like this xx #abitofeverything

  3. Alice says:

    Well, at least the Baby is there for The Toddler to blame imaginary cake failings on, and you have someone to imaginarily clean up, albeit quite throwingly… Tommy Cooper would certainly be proud. 😀
    x a

  4. Ooooh, a lovely story! Such a shame there was no cake in the end though! I love that The Baby got blamed for everything that went wrong, that is certainly something we can identify with in our house…!

  5. El says:

    No, why didn’t Silly Mummy get any Cake? I am aggrieved on your behalf and on behalf of all Mummies all round the world! Brilliant Brilliant post! I just adore your writing style! Thanks for sharing with #abitofeverything

  6. Ooo if I got cake every time I closed my eyes that WOULD be magic! It must be very frustrating being a magical baker when your staff start cleaning up before you serve though, I feel the toddler’s pain. Thanks so much for linking up this and all your wonderful posts at #sharethejoy this year and a very Merry Christmas to you all xx

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