Children’s TV: I Have Some Questions

children-403582_1920 So, I now see rather a lot of children’s television, and I have some questions. 21 to be exact.

 
Peppa Pig
1. Why would Mummy Pig climb a blackberry bush? Who climbs blackberry bushes?

2. Will children be more upset when they discover Father Christmas is not real, or when they discover what would really have happened to Pedro Pony when he broke his leg?

3. Why are everyone’s eyes on the same side of their heads? More importantly, what is on the other side?

CBeebies
4. Why do the CBeebies presenters have a baby?

5. Where did the CBeebies presenters get a baby from?

6. Do the authorities know the CBeebies presenters have a baby?

7. Where do the CBeebies presenters keep the baby?

8. Does the CBeebies baby like it in her drawer?

Topsy and Tim
9. Why didn’t Topsy and Tim retain its original title, Village of the Damned 2: The Midwich Cuckoos Bred?

Baby Jake
10. Why don’t Baby Jake’s family have some kind of child safe window guards or latches, given that they live in a windmill (and seem to spend an inordinate amount of time encouraging a multitude of children to lean out of the windows)? What kind of a safety message is this sending out to all the other ten children families living in windmills?

11. Why do Baby Jake’s family live in a windmill?

Mr Bloom
12. How is Mr Bloom ‘all about and everywhere’? Is Mr Bloom a god?* Father Christmas?

(*Please note, this is rhetorical. I do not want to hear personal views on the whether Mr Bloom is a god, as I find it upsetting.)

 
Woolly and Tig
13. Does anyone ever wash Woolly? Apparently, the average cuddly toy, engaging in average cuddly toy activities, is filthy and full of bacteria. I can only assume Woolly is probably carrying bubonic plague by now.

Waybuloos
14. Why? That is all.

In the Night Garden
15. Why do the Tombliboos trousers matches their arses?

16. Why do the Tombliboos bother to wear trousers?

17. Why don’t the Tombliboos lend their pointless trousers too Upsy Daisy, who can’t keep her dress down?

18. Why do the Ninky Nonk and the Pinky Ponk randomly change size? I was going to say it’s like being in a dream. That may be why. Scratch this one.

19. Who thought Makka Pakka was a good idea for a name in a programme aimed at children who are just learning to talk and prone to mispronunciation?

20. I know people have asked before, but is Iggle Piggle dead?

Mr Tumble
21. Why did nobody question whether having Mr Tumble ask children to look for his ‘three special things’ was the best way to phrase it?

 
 

(Please note: there are, of course, so many questions about Sarah and Duck, but I have covered these before. In some detail. I have therefore decided not to fall down that particular rabbit hole again. Too stressful…Wandering about with a duck, I ask you…No. Must stop.)

44 comments

  1. Lady Nym says:

    The Ninky Nonk and Pinky Ponk changing sizes all the time irritates me an irrational amount.

    The thing I find weirdest about Peppa Pig is the way mammals seem to be people whilst birds and reptiles are pets. But they get a ride-on horse with wheels (despite having Pedro Pony as a friend) and the queen is still human and it just…stresses me out.

    #AnythingGoes

  2. Kirsty says:

    Haha this is funny. I was In the Night Garden with my little one and it makes me laugh when I watch it….I don’t thank Iggle Piggle as when he falls backwards at the end, my little boy copies so have to try and catch him to stop any pre bedtime injury….. #fartglitter x

  3. Why does the Ninky Nonk keep changing size? I’m glad that freaks you out too. It actually makes me want to swear at the telly! Also why does Upsy Daisy’s hair appear to move independently? Wrong wrong wrong! Brilliant post as always. I do enjoy my little visits to your blog ;0) #fartglitter

  4. Jade Munro says:

    Oh how you make me laugh. as usual πŸ™‚
    I watch all of these on a daily basis and am generally quite happy to go along with most of it. Except… Topsy and Tim’s mum. She is rather perfect. Her hair! is styled. Her make up! is flawless. And she never gets annoyed or has a small glass of wine mid-afternoon to get her through to “daddy’s home!”
    Share your secret Mrs Topsy&Tim
    Great post!
    xx
    #TwinklyTuesday

  5. Habiba says:

    This is such a funny post, I love it! ALL of the CBeebies questions about the baby I have too. But I confess I secretly love Waybuloo, maybe even more than my little one!! #babybrainmonday

  6. Thankfully, out of these we’re only familiar with Peppa (although I did catch a bit of Baby Jake last week when Little Miss A was sick. Wt*A*F is going on in that show?!).
    But I digress. Other Peppa questions:
    1. In one episode, Daddy Pig runs to raise money to buy a new school roof. *SPOILER ALERT!* As he’s being chased by a wasp he succeeds in not only raising enough for the roof, but also a new bus! Just how far did he run?!
    2. In another episode, the children catch a cough at school and Dr Brown Bear is summoned. He promptly administers medicine, but the parents are only told about it later?!
    3. Why is George called George and not some alliteration of P like all the other characters?
    So many questions. I bet Toddler and Little Miss A know the answers…

  7. El says:

    I’m am so sorry but I have no answer for you. You can a)live with it, b)write a thesis on it or c) have cake therapy. I think we both know it’s c, right? LOL….Funny and so true. #BabybrainMonday

  8. haha I realise now my daughter watches way too much Disney Pixar as I only really know Peppa and In the nIght Garden from this list! Iggle Piggle dead? OMG never thought of it that way! I do think that whole show is insane but I love the music. Thanks for linking up to #bestandworst!! xx

  9. Ha ha ha ha…. this post had me in stitches!! All good honest questions and to be honest I have so much more, especially when it comes to Peppa and the gang!! I think you need to step away from the television screen! Thank you so much for linking up to #SundayStars xxx

  10. Oh I have SO many questions! It’s like a neverending unsatisfactory mastermind episode in my head with one of the yellow cbeebie things in the chair. Yes, where did they get the baby from? And who thought baby jake would ever be a good idea? And why does Mr Maker have such a huge travel budget? Why are Rory and Fern (?) always in the same clothes…did they film it ALL in one day. etc etc etc etc. #bestandworst xx

  11. I don’t know if I should be excited or terrified at what is ahead for us when it comes to children’s TV. At the moment Caspian’s happy with the baby einstein puppets, and those are scary enough! #brilliantblogposts

    Nadia – ScandiMummy x

  12. PinkPearBear says:

    Hahaha oh I do love your observations on life! I also do not get the Waybaloos at all and am quite frankly thrilled we are not in that zone anymore and have now migrated towards milkshake. Although the adverts around this time are worse then the brain washing of the demon headmaster! (Now that was a good kid’s tv show!) This is a very useful post and I will use it to bear reference to now I’m sort of a little bit venturing into making kid’s tv. Ish! πŸ˜€ #babybrainmonday

  13. Does Makka Pakka have OCD? Is that why he cleans everything?
    Why do we never see the Wottingers?
    Why do the Twirliwoo’s run with their arms behind them?

    I love this post! So true! Kids programmes are a mindfield of questions. #brilliantblogposts

  14. becky says:

    ”Why did nobody question whether having Mr Tumble ask children to look for his β€˜three special things’ was the best way to phrase it?” Not gonna lie…I snorted! Great list and some very thought provoking questions! #TheList

  15. Mum in Brum says:

    Haha, In the Night Garden – I have so many questions! Like is the whole production team on LSD? Why do I feel like I’m watching the same episode every night?? Great post #brilliantblogposts

  16. Alice says:

    Having discovered early on that Iggle Piggle is so facially similar to David Cameron that they surely MUST be related, I can no longer enjoy his nighttime excursions without lending them a sinister right-leaning overtone, in my mind at least. HE IS EVEN BLUE! Surely his red blanket is made from the skin of a past Labour leader..?
    I may be reading too much into this.
    x a

  17. Oh noooooo this just shows how long it’s been since I lived in the UK as I don’t know any of these excpet for Peppa Pig πŸ™ Loved Topsy and Tim as a kid though. I do wish I could answer your questions lol. Thanks for linking to (the last, sniff sniff) #BabyBrainMonday

  18. YES!! YES!! WHY do the Ninky Nonk and Pinky Ponk change size constantly β€” the ratio is all wrong!! It was driving me mad for weeks β€” I think the creator was on acid when they made In The Night Garden. Thanks so much for linking up with us on #TwinklyTuesday

  19. Jenny says:

    Hahaha love the questions and curious mind too. These are fantastic Thank you for stopping by LTM and linking up to SWM. I hope to see you again tomorrow for another great round of #sharewithme

  20. Min says:

    I nearly spat out my drink at Mr Tumble! I have a few theories of my own on the Night Garden, and wrote about these a while back, but the most pertinent questions here for me relate to the random CBeebies baby. I just can’t work out whose baby she is, and what the point of having a baby as a spare presenter is. Does she belong to one of the crew? Was it bring your child to work day? Is she supposed to be teaching the little ‘uns watching how to look after their younger siblings? And most importantly, how do they get her to eat food when I have never been able to get my own offspring to eat on demand, let alone when there are TV cameras about!

  21. So apart from the English countryside, this is another reason why I do occasionally miss the UK. We don’t get ANY British kids’ programming here. It’s all American stuff (sorry if that’s politically incorrect) like Nickelodean and Boomerang and it’s just dreadful. In the Night Garden came out after I left the UK but I remember my sister bringing a few books over with her. When I say the name Ninky Nonk and all the others, I was on the floor (especially when she confessed her hubby has a VERY rude joke about Ninky Nonk) Fab stuff again my dear. You never fail to make me laugh. Thanks for linking to #passthesaucd

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