It has come to my attention that many nursery rhymes seem to have a common – somewhat disturbing – theme, but they’re trying to be subtle about it. So I’ve fixed that for them.
Rock-a-bye Baby
Rock-a-bye baby, in the treetop
When the wind blows, the cradle will rock
When the bough breaks, the cradle will fall
And down will come baby, dead and all
Jack and Jill
Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water
Jack fell down and died
And Jill came tumbling after…and also died
Humpty Dumpty
Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall
All the king’s horses and all the king’s men
Couldn’t put Humpty together again
Humpty was dead
It’s Raining, It’s Pouring
It’s raining, it’s pouring
The old man is snoring
He went to bed and bumped his head
And couldn’t get up in the morning
Because he was dead…like Humpty
Old Mother Hubbard
Old Mother Hubbard
Went to the cupboard
To get her poor doggie a bone
When she got there
The cupboard was bare
And so the poor doggie had none
And died
Ring-a-ring O’ Roses
Ring-a-ring o’ roses
A pocket full of posies
A-tishoo! A-tishoo!
We all fall down dead
Peter Peter Pumpkin-eater
Peter Peter pumpkin-eater
Had a wife and couldn’t keep her
He murderered her and put her body in a pumpkin shell
And there he kept her very well…until his arrest
Thank god for The Old Lady Who Swallowed a Fly and Oranges and Lemons, which are at least blatant about the dead, they’re all dead aspect.
Only you, Lucy, would be able to pull this list of macabre nursery rhymes together. You are absolutely correct. Everyone is dead! I know I shouldn’t be laughing, but I am.
Dead Dead Dead
So true and so funny.
#fridayfrolics
hehehe! This did make me chuckle. Nursery rhymes are not nice at all! x
Hahah – I love this. Nursery rhymes are fucked up, aren’t they? So much death. #FridayFrolics
I so hear you.I’ve always thought that it must have come from childhood in the olden days when everyone was dying all the blumin time.What else was there to sing about apart from death and porridge?#fridayfrolics
LOVE this! And so would my kinder! OMG, you had me rolling. The macabre is just so subtly wonderful! #FridayFrolics xoxo
No wonder we didn’t sleep well as children…we were all worried from the nursery rhymes!!!
Now you need to come up with some positive ones….
🙂
At least Peter was arrested.
Imagine what you could do with Chicken Little!!
Dead, dead and gone. Weren’t they all supposed to be warnings to keep us from dying, too? Rhyming just made them easier to remember and if you can remember them, you stay alive.