The Toddlers: STILL Supporting Brexit?

eu-1473958_1920Following the utter disaster, sorry, outcome of the EU Referendum, I’m sure many of you are wondering if The Toddlers are still Brexit supporters, and how they are dealing with the fallout.

Unfortunately, the signs continue to point to The Toddlers being firmly in the Brexit camp.

1. Having cried, shouted and stamped their feet because they wanted their toy dinosaurs, they are both now refusing to touch or do anything with said dinosaurs. God help anyone who suggests that maybe we should accept that we don’t really want the dinosaurs and just put them away, though. They wanted those dinosaurs, damn it. It is their right to have those dinosaurs. It is not relevant that the dinosaurs no longer seem like a good idea, and they aren’t quite sure what to do with them.

2. The toddlers look pleased with themselves. This is usually a fairly accurate sign of impending doom.

3. The Toddlers have made a few decisions based on dodgy information supplied by a not very trustworthy stuffed crocodile. These decisions have turned out to be a little questionable. The Toddlers are not admitting this.

4. The Toddlers had claimed that Mummy was giving £350 million biscuits a week to Daddy. They wanted these biscuits redirecting to their bellies. It has since transpired that The Toddlers may have miscalculated slightly. There may not have been £350 million biscuits. The Toddlers have since denied making the claim altogether. They are currently denying ever having heard of biscuits.

5. The Toddlers like to tell Mummy that they want to be in charge, they know what they are doing, and Mummy should go away. Upon getting their way, The Toddlers tend to ask Mummy to come back and take charge again.

6. The Toddlers have been very angry and indignant about perceived injustices. The Toddlers perceive many injustices: everyone is out to get them. In the cold light of day, it turns out that The Toddlers may have misunderstood the situation slightly. This may have been the result of not listening.

7. The Toddlers like someone to blame. They are not particularly concerned with whether they are blaming the right person. So far today Mummy has been to blame for the weather, something Peppa Pig did, and blue. As such, The Toddlers have voted to leave Mummy.

8. The Toddlers’ currency is raisins. The value of their currency took a steep decline this morning after they ate it on a whim.

9. The Big Toddler feels that, though her decision to swing a wooden crocodile through the air has smacked the Little Toddler in the face and hurt her, that isn’t really her problem. She doesn’t feel that she should be accountable. She doesn’t accept that she had any responsibility to consider the potential consequences of swinging a wooden crocodile through the air before doing it. It was her right to swing a wooden crocodile through the air, and she believes it was in her best interests to do so. She believes that the Little Toddler should stop whining about being smacked in the face by a wooden crocodile, accept that she lost, and get over it.

10. The Toddlers are currently denying the existence of their ELC Toy Box Musical Adventure Bus. Photographic evidence of them with the bus notwithstanding, they both claim never to have seen it.

(Once again, these may, in fact, all be signs that certain grown adults are behaving like toddlers, rather than that The Toddlers are supporting Brexit.)

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    • Linda Hobden says:

      And now I have the same image in my mind – thanks Laura!

      It makes life after #Brexit when you think of the government as toddlers – I include all parties in that assumption too – although Corbyn has been more like the Queen of Hearts – “off with his head!” – with his recent hiring & firing spree!

  1. sisterkin says:

    Those bloomin’ toddlers trying to govern our land. I blame them for the downfall of this country and using this government as a free creche. Fab post as ever. #TwinklyTuesday

  2. Talya says:

    Quite honestly now more than ever it feels like the whole decision was made by a bunch of toddlers -let’s hope we manage to find some solutions which don’t seem like a toddler concocted them – eek! Love this. x

  3. Sarah HP says:

    I think there was a toddler addressing the EU assembly yesterday! Maybe this is our hope if it is toddlers in charge and then maybe we could make it all better with milk and cookies and a few rounds of the wheels on the bus!

  4. You almost give the politicians too much credit here by comparing them with toddlers. At least toddlers (usually) keep their faeces to the confines of a nappy, whereas Johnson, Farage etc seem to be spreading theirs across the entire country. #chucklemums

  5. John Adams says:

    Fascinating reading this! As it happens, my kids have taken to pointing at every single “leave” poster still visible in a disapproving way! #BrilliantBlogPosts

  6. Pen says:

    Excellent. The current political soap opera is an excellent advert to NOT SEND YOUR CHILD TO ETON, that’s all I can say. Not that I ever could or would, but now I don’t feel bad about. Pen x #brilliantblogposts

  7. MMT says:

    We should set about finding 350 million biscuits and bury a couple (or more) of useless politicians under them.
    Thanks for linking up to #coolmumclub

  8. Yvonne says:

    I think you are right, this indicates some adults are behaving like toddlers ha ha! Keep these posts coming, they are making me smile in bleak times 🙂 xx

  9. ShoeboxofM says:

    I can neither confirm nor deny this joke is funny. It is a good joke though and I’m glad you told it which is why I will give you a follow up joke with a different punchline. A real honest punchline for real honest people.

  10. The Pramshed says:

    A lovely and different blog post about BREXIT, I found this very refreshing to read. I hope that the toddlers are right, and that BREXIT is the right to decision, to lift the gloom from me. Love the association with raisins! Thanks so much for linking up at #fortheloveofBLOG. Claire x

  11. Maria says:

    This is brilliant as always! To be fair I think the toddlers would probably make a much better job of it all! Sorry my comment is so late! This is for last weeks #ForTheLoveOfBlog

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