Toddler Proverbs

cat-20688_1920Not many people know, but toddlers love a good proverb. Obviously, I am aware that many of you turn to R is for Hoppit for our aspirational lifestyle guidance. As such, I felt it was my duty to compile this list of ten pieces of proverbial wisdom toddlers in the know swear by.

1. Two wrongs…are just the start.

2. Cleanliness is next to impossible.

3. Fortune favours the downright cheeky

4. Never look an angry cat in the mouth.

5. A watched mummy will eventually provide biscuits. Really stare.

6. If it ain’t broke, try harder.

7. Too many toddlers spoil the sofa.

8. Good things come to those who demand them. NOW.

9. If you play with fire, you’ll get burned. Like the last time. And the time before that.

10. Do unto others as you would have them do unto you (i.e. slap each other).


  1. Eliana says:

    8 and 9 all the time! Not with fire though..haha I really liked your post, so much that I shared it on the other thread. Haha what a coincidence.. X


  2. Mrs Tubbs says:

    So funny … Love it. For the broke one, the Shaggy defence always applies. If you say it wasn’t me often enough, it will become true. Even if it was. 😉

  3. Savannah says:

    Absolutely brilliant, haha! I was definitely smiling and laughing along the whole way. “If it ain’t broke-try harder” is my son’s goal in life, seriously. #KCACOLS

  4. Tammymum says:

    This is brilliant and very spot on. Yep this mummy will definietly cave and always provide biscuits! Thanks for linking at #KCACOLS. Hope you can come again next Sunday xx

  5. LOL! Although I don’t have a toddler there are some of these proverbs that I need to start applying in my home. Hmmmm…I wonder if it still works when you are in your 40s? If I stare at my mom hard enough will biscuits be provided? I need to try, I’ll let you know! LOL

    BTW, congrats on the shortlist for BiBs! I voted for you, good luck! Love your blog!

  6. ShoeboxofM says:

    It is easier to gain forgiveness than permission seems to the preferred option.

    A change is as good as a…NO CHANGE! WAUGH! *runs away, hides behind curtain*


  7. Kaye says:

    Another hilairs post! Love the biscuit one, haha, so so true. And too many toddlers ruin anything, not just the sofa!! Thanks for linking up to #MarvMondays. Kaye xo

  8. Jenny says:

    I love this so true and so funny. Huge huge congratulations on the Bibs that’s such a great accomplishment to be in the finalist and recognized for writing. I wish you all the best luck hunny. You deserve it. Thanks for linking up to Share With Me. I have enjoyed reading your blog posts and so grateful for you linking up. I hope you will continue to link up in the next few weeks as I had the reins over to the new Share With Me hostess and continue long after linking up with her too. #sharewithme

  9. Hahaha!!!! ???
    The death stare…it gets me every time. I can feel his eyes drilling into my head until I cave and get him the snack he’s just had a meltdown over not getting. Anything for a quiet life…and to keep all my limbs ?? X

  10. Baby Anon says:

    Ha ha, this is hilarious. I particularly liked ‘cleanliness is next to impossible.’ I keep telling her to stop buying me fancy pants dresses but Mother just won’t listen. Not my fault when they’re ruined and stained 😉 x #passthesauce

  11. I love no 1: you are spot on 2 wrongs are just the start – they keep going until it ends in tears here. 7 too even though mine aren’t toddlers (especially as I have a new sofA) SICK OF SHOUTING shoes of the sofa please. ?

  12. Spot on – as always! It’s weird I’ve followed you from Caspian was a tiny baby and till now where he too is a toddler and everything is coming true! Thank you for all the warnings though, it’s making everything a little easier 😉 Thanks for co-hosting #Passthesauce

    Nadia – ScandiMummy

  13. 5 & 6 – just brilliant! I just throw biscuits at the little one now as soon as he approaches me. I can’t handle even the thought of “The Stare!”
    Thanks for hosting #pass the sauce x

  14. A lot of these sound familiar, but “cleanliness is next to impossible ” is one of mine! My toddler is always trying to clean things, like the dirty floor with a clean tea towel. I just give up on cleaning. Thanks for hosting #passthesauce

  15. Jade Lloyd says:

    You had me crying with laughter at two wrongs are just the start…this one I am going to print on a t-shirt for my son. Really clever idea…totally agree with all! #KCACOLS

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