Trust Me, I’m a Toddler

Grandad is visiting. The Toddler needs to take a look at his leg. Thankfully, The Toddler is a doctor today. Goodness knows what we would have done if this had been one of the days when she is an imaginary painter and decorator.

Anyway, Grandad’s leg is playing up. Literally. It keeps waving around in a most indecorous manner. The Toddler is not impressed. This is not the proper way for a leg to behave. She tells the leg, in no uncertain terms, to: ‘Calm down!’

Doctor Toddler feels further investigations are needed: ‘Get doctor kit. Need to fix you, Grandad.’ The Toddler rushes off and returns with her doctor’s kit. She is now ready to take care of Grandad. She explains what she will be doing to Grandad: ‘Me check you.’

Out comes the stethoscope. The Toddler puts it on and holds the end to Grandad’s chest: ‘Breathe out.’ (Breathe out? Where has she learnt this? Has Silly Mummy tuned out the episode of Peppa Pig where Peppa goes to medical school: ‘Oh, Peppa! You can’t use defibrillators in a muddy puddle! Ho ho ho!’)
Grandad asks, ‘Am I okay?’
The Toddler is reassuring: ‘Yeah.’

The examination is not yet over. The Toddler is now brandishing an otoscope and prodding at Grandad’s ear. Grandad enquires, ‘How’re my ears?’
The Toddler has further good news: ‘It’s good!’

Grandad is not The Toddler’s only patient. The Toddler approaches Silly Mummy, waving medical instruments: ‘And you!’ Apparently, Silly Mummy is also due for a health check. Silly Mummy is a little nervous: The Toddler’s Peppa Pig and George figures have already undergone preliminary tests. Silly Mummy fears the results were not good: Peppa and George have been bundled into the doctor’s kit. That can’t be a good sign.

The Toddler has now checked Grandad’s reflexes with her little hammer, and threatened to ‘do something’ with the tweezers. Her examination of Grandad is complete, and The Toddler appears to have identified the problem. She points at Grandad: ‘This is not funny!’ It’s just good to finally have a diagnosis.

My Random MusingsTwinkly TuesdayModern Dad PagesFriday Frolics
My Random MusingsTwinkly TuesdayModern Dad PagesFriday Frolics

29 comments

    • Silly Mummy says:

      Indeed – I dread to think what her judgement would be on whether Mummy is funny! She’s never seen Doc McStuffins, actually. Given how taken she is with a 7 year old with a duck, I can only imagine how much she would love a doctor with a lamb! Thanks for popping by!

  1. Becky (@EducatingR) says:

    This is hilarious! I love your style of writing. So glad Dr Toddler was there to save the day and look forward to hearing of other roles she adopts! Thanks for linking to #wineandboobs

    • Silly Mummy says:

      Yes, she has picked up loads of sayings from Justin’s House too – I suddenly realise where she is getting all these things if I actually listen to the programmes she likes! Thanks for reading!

  2. Rob says:

    Very cute post. I love when the little ones play make believe: doctor, teacher or nurse. It’s just fun and sounds like your dad had fun too. #wineandboobs

  3. Natasha says:

    Adorable! I do wander where they learn some things. S got a little doctors kit as part of milkshake magazine..he put the stethoscope in his ears and then asked to listen to my heart?! I was very impressed! Thanks for linking up to #happyquacks I’d really appreciate if you could put my badge on the bottom of your post xx

  4. Clare says:

    Haha! Doctor Toddler sounds incredibly thorough! This did have me laughing away at the laptop! I’m glad granddad is ok! 🙂 I think I may be spending a few more hours on here! I love the site! And your writing style is so funny! #FridayFrolics xx

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